Raw expanding to nine hours

Monday Night Raw, the flagship weekly program of World Wrestling Entertainment, will increase in duration to nine hours starting in February, according to sources in the company.

“The transition from two hours to three hours has been a big success,” said the source, speaking to Kayfabe News on condition of anonymity.

“So we figure a nine-hour broadcast will provide triple the entertainment.”

The rumor has been met with some skepticism from wrestling fans, many of whom believe Raw is already bloated and padded with filler. Some believe the ever-ballooning duration of Raw is merely an attempt to boost advertising revenues, and does not contribute to a more entertaining program.

In order to fill the nine-hour time slot between 8 p.m. and 5 a.m., a number of adjustments will be made to the format of Raw, including:

- episodes of MizTV will be two hours each, and will feature at least 50 minutes of The Miz repeating the word “really”

- Michael Cole will spend at least 90 minutes talking exclusively about Twitter, Tout, hashtags and the WWE smartphone app

- The members of the Shield will be shown not only walking through the crowd in the arena, but also walking home afterward

- Every bout will be a 60-minute Iron Man match

Spoiler:

I knew this was a joke...9 hour Raws...HA!