The Sports Guy
Number of posts : 31046
Age : 35
Location : Maryland
Registration date : 2008-08-19
|Subject: 5 Signs You Are Being Possessed By the Devil!! Sat 19 Apr 2014, 11:27 am|| |
1: You Let A Shady Cab Driver Take You To A Satanic Ritual
Letís say youíre an otherwise smart, upper middle-class couple with a decent head on your shoulders. Youíve just gotten married. The world is at your fingertips. Letting a cab driver take you to a shady club in a foreign country, even if its for free, is pretty dumb. There must be some demonic force already at work to make you do such a thing.
2: You Crave Raw Meat
I eat a lot of meat. Iím trying to eat less, but itís hard when Iíve just found all of these new BBQ restaurants in my neighborhood. That being said, eating raw meat Ė especially when pregnant Ė is a bad move, even to this heavily carnivorous writer. Is the Devil even a demon? Iím pretty sure he is. Though Iím even more sure that eating raw meat while pregnant is not in that Dr. Spock book. Thank God we can afford that book now.
3: Youíre Telekinetic
While telekinesis isnít always a sign of being possessed by the Devil, here it is because this is a movie about demonic cults, Devil worshippers and kids that, more likely than not, will grow up to be fairly familiar with Satan himself. If I was telekinetic I would use it to print money somehow.
4: You Punch Out The Windows Of Inconsiderate Drivers
I hate it when cars almost hit me. I hate it even more when they DO hit me. And if they hit my pregnant wife, Iíd lost my sh*t. Unless my pregnant wife was possessed by the Devil or something and could practically disassemble the car with her bare hands. Luckily Iíve just ensured that all of our bills are paid and I can cover the deductible on the insurance!
5: You Make Your Priest Have A Stroke
Letís face it. Strokes are common. But so are priests so no worries! Still, making one almost bleed out in front of a bunch of little kids isnít very ladylike. In fact, itís Devil-like. Iíd say youíre possessed by the Devil in this case. Either that or you are *very* hot. But again, all your bases are covered for the month so send your husband over there with some expensive roses to get the real skinny on your condition.
Number of posts : 13322
Age : 33
Location : At the Beach
Job/hobbies : zombies
Favorite WWE Wrestler :
Favorite WWE Diva :
Favorite TNA Wrestler : Roode
Favorite TNA Knockout : Brooke
Registration date : 2008-07-03
|Subject: Re: 5 Signs You Are Being Possessed By the Devil!! Sun 20 Apr 2014, 12:19 am|| |
I remember seeing the last one in a supernatural episode.
|Did You Miss Her?|
Hall Of Famer
Number of posts : 9685
Age : 32
Location : Xavier's School Is Where I'm Laying My Head!
Job/hobbies : Stroking Zachary Quinto's Ego....
Favorite WWE Wrestler : Dolph Ziggler, Kofi Kingston, John Morrison, Santino, Edge, Christian, Cody Rhodes, Randy Orton, Sheamus, & CM Punk.
Favorite WWE Diva : Melina, Beth Phoenix, Layla, Alicia Fox, & Gail Kim.
Favorite TNA Wrestler : Daniels, MCMGs, Crimson, Amazing Redd, Eric Young, Matt Morgan, Kurt Angle, & Generation Me.
Favorite TNA Knockout : Winter, Brooke Tessmacher, Mickie James, Madison Rayne, & Angelina Love.
Registration date : 2008-07-27
|Subject: Re: 5 Signs You Are Being Possessed By the Devil!! Sun 20 Apr 2014, 3:12 am|| |
|Subject: Re: 5 Signs You Are Being Possessed By the Devil!! || |