REIGNBOW
World Champion
Number of posts : 1692
Age : 30
Location : The Land Of Sexy
Job/hobbies : Being the person you all love :)
Favorite WWE Wrestler : CM Punk
dolph ziggler
Sheamus
Cody Rhodes
Favorite WWE Diva : paige
Layla El
Rosa Mendes
Alicia Fox
Favorite TNA Wrestler : Alex Shelley
Austin Aries
Favorite TNA Knockout : Brooke Tessmacher
Rosita
Registration date : 2009-11-24
 | |  Losing hope, more and more , everyday. | |
It's seem like lately, i have nothing good to think or say about myself. I'm just sick of living this life that i pretend is so good. but its the opposite. whats the point of living if you dont even like yourself? your life? and sometimes your own family. cant trust to talk to my own mother, without everyone else in the world finding out. i couldnt go to her and tell her how i felt, cause she wouldnt take me serious, she would have someone else try to talk to me. i cant reach out, she doesnt care, she said im only hurting myself so why not commit the ultamite hurt, and just die. im sick of living, maybe , just maybe the afterlife would be better than living in misery. I could be so happy one day, and then bam, instantly a thought goes through my mind, of how everyone else i know lives the life i wish i could live, and then i sit and cry and cry, and feel pitty for myself, i go to sleep, and i sometimes hope i dont wake up. i just dont know anymore, i dont know how much i could take. i just wanna go leave, be with the one person i know im sure id be happy with, but i cant even do that. Im going to be a nobody, everyone else i know in school, the girls i hate, some i like, they have everything going for them, and i have nothing. In today';s world, everything is circled around looks, you dont have it, your going to be nothing, and i am, and always be nothing. I just feel this darkness in me, and i feel no hope, i think im better off dead. i really do, and i know some of you are going to reply and say im beautiful, im special, i am something, and that i wouldnt be better of dead, but no matter how much you guys tell me, i dont believe it, and i never will, oh sometimes i'll act like i have confidence, i'll ask like im hot, but deep down inside its just an act , covering up the darkness inside that just wants to come out. its an act, if i asked like how i really felt, id be shipped off to a insane house, my best friend doesnt even know im like this. And yes im telling people on the net, because i dont know you all so personally, you dont live near me to tell someone i know about how i feel. Thats why im so open, its a why of expressing myself. If i knew you all personally and you knew my friend or family, id be putting on that fake smile for you guys. Well thats it. For now, the darkness will come back. Till then, bye. | |
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sis you sound like me. i have nothing good to say about myself. but when times like this happen look to your friends and your sis to help you realize how awesome you truly are. I brag about you to everyone as if you were a flesh and blood relative. I talk about you more than my blood sister who lives in Texas, that's how highly i think of you dear. If you cant see how awesome you are, that's ok. I'll always be here to constantly remind you and tell you how amazing you are and how lucky i am to have an amazing friend and sister like you.
What would i ever do without you, you understand me. Thats so nice of you 
, I feel the same way.